Viewing Joke:

Category:Judge jokes
Date Added:11/10/2007
Rating:not yet rated     
Views:189
 
Joke:A prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman, to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. Ive known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, youve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think youre a rising big shot when you havent the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"She again replied, "Why, yes I do. Ive known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. Hes lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man cant build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, youll be jailed for contempt!"
 


More Judge Jokes:

1.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
The Judge admonished the witness, "Do you understand that you have sworn to tell the truth?""I do.""Do you understand wh... more

2.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
The cross eyed judge looked at the three defendants in the dock and said to the first one, "So how do you plead?""Not gu... more

3.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
The defendant stood up in the dock and said to the judge, "I dont recognize this court!""Why?" asked the Judge."Because... more

4.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
Judge: All your responses to the questions must be oral. Do you understand?A: YesJudge: What school did you attend in th... more

5.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
Judge: Are you married?A. No, Im divorced.Judge. And what did your husband do before you divorced him?A. A lot of things... more

6.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
Judge: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?A: All my autopsies are on dead people.... more

7.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced the opposing lawyers. "So," he said, "I have been presented, by both of... more

8.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
The Judge asked the defendant, "Mr. Jones ,do you understand that you have sworn to tell the truth, the whole truth and... more

9.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
The judge said to his dentist: "Pull my tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth."... more

10.   Category: Judge jokes  0 stars
Mr. Schneider stood up in court. "As God is my judge, I do not owe myex-wife any money."Glaring down at him, the judge r... more